Train strike - a 2 month old post from NIHT.

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Oh, fuckity fuck fuck fuck.

HEY LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Guess what? It's the most magical thing that's happened twice to us Queenslanders in two weeks! Oh, no, you're not going to guess it.. it's just so special, you're going to scream with joy! I know some people who have jumped off the top story of a high rise building, because they have been to happy to hear this news! Oh, yes, I vomited up my own lampshade because this was just so exciting!

I must apologise for usign the same words over and over, my brain is just caught in an indefinite loop - it's overwhelmed, dazzled, like a 13 year old sniffing video head cleaner! Want to know? Can you handle it? Bet you can't. Here goes anyway.


Why, you ask, why does this piss me off? And by piss off, I mean overwhelm with joy. Of course, it's a major inconvenience for me, but what worries me most is the train drivers. Their sanity. This is the second day in two weeks that they're taking off so that they can drive our trains naked back and forth between central station and the Gold Coast. Sometimes, they play jazz music, but they're most often heard pumping out some phat beats out of the train speakers. They've been known to fuck up the speakers with the immense amount of bass reverberating out of the speakers, and around the train. You know what? They don't even have the decency to wear any clothes. Oh, come on! You could be wearing some pretty, glittery catsuits, made from plastic you found stuffed under a seat. How about you rip one of the doors off and fashion it to your body?

Oh yeah! That would be awesome! Or, how about you just drive the fucking train? As long as you get me to my destination, I couldn't give a shit if you're masturbating on the seat next to me. Somewhere, deep inside, a little voice is screaming "Oh my, Elissa! What a wrong thought to have!" But, oh God. Why don't we give all of the train drivers therapy, and drive the trains ourselves? From the sounds of the amateur announcer on the train today, it's obvious they're looking for fresh meat to train up. Oh, that would be great! GET AN APPRENTICESHIP IN TRAIN ANNOUNCING! Fuck, I'm quitting my day job, even though I work part time.

Oh man. I'm going to hang around at central station all day with binoculars looking out for naked train drivers doing the tango, or fucking each other in the ass. Either way, it will be a wonderful sight!

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